web analytics

The NBA Finals Are Just a Contest to See Who Wins The Chance to Refuse Trump’s White House Invitation

Perhaps if the Celtics beat the Cavs or if the Rockets didn’t morph into rancid Twizzlers in the second half last night, we’d have a more competitive Finals ahead of us. I don’t believe the Celtics would beat the Warriors, but they have enough long, bouncy, and twitchy athletes with mailbox-sized chips on their shoulders to make them (and the Rockets) very uncomfortable. And while the Rockets would still be favored in a Rockets/Cavs Finals, I believe Lebron would’ve found a way to win. Especially since Chris Paul would have (probably) been out for at least the first two games.

But alas, what happened happened and now we’re left with the fourth season of a show that hasn’t been good since season two. The only way this series will be even remotely competitive is if Steph sprains an ankle or Kevin Durant finds a competent barber.

Instead, I’m most interested in what will happen first:

1. The Warriors refusing Trump’s White House invitation (again)

2. Trump deciding (again) to rescind the invitation after learning that they’re not coming

3. Trump being proactive and deciding to announce that the Warriors won’t be invited

I’m tempted to say that Trump will announce that the Warriors aren’t invited before the Warriors even have a chance to turn him down. Shit, he might even tweet it while the confetti is still dropping.

“CONGRATS TO THE NEW NBA CHAMPION GOLDEN STATE UNGRATEFUL WARRIORS WHO WILL NEVER BE INVITED TO THE WHITE HOUSE!”

But I think he’ll invite them, knowing they’ll turn him down, just so he’ll be able to pretend to be the bigger man.

“I was willing to FORGIVE them and Steph OBAMA CHICAGO Curry for last year’s DISRESPECT but no. Sad!”

Anyway, Warriors in four.

source: VSB

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.